I Was Afraid to Look for a Picture for this Post…

11 04 2010

Dear American Apparel,

You seem to have lots of cute basic clothes (and some weird stuff…) I like basics; I enjoy owning the same featureless shirt in many different colors. Perhaps you can tell that I am a lazy dresser. However, you don’t have any stores near me. So, being a fancy-pants modern chick, I go to your website…

… And my father walks by. He stops. I look up to find him staring at the screen. We meet eyes in a moment even more awkward than Leia and Luke’s incest Star Wars kiss. My 56-year old dad thinks I am looking at porn in our kitchen.

YOU NEED TO MAKE A PG VERSION OF YOUR WEBSITE! Also, I am convinced some of those models have no bones. I mean… really, pretzel models? REALLY? No one will ever wear that gold jumpsuit with their ankles crossed behind their skull. No one. Ever.

Sincerely, Me

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